MONDAY SHOW BLOG (11/14/11)

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Today’s Anthem: JESSE MCCARTNEY

WHERE CAN YOU FIND THE SHOW THIS WEEK?

WOODY AND RIZZ WENT TO SHOWS….AND PATRICO STAYED AT HOME?!
Woody and Rizz both went to shows this weekend – which was insane.  Woody went to the Urge and loved it…but he hated the opening band R6 Implant.  He claims he thinks they are the worst band in the history of music.  And Rizz went to Puscifer…and Rizz hated it.  He was extremely upset and disappointed and he left early. 

  • According to a study – there’s a significant connection between sex with animals and dong cancer.  432 men in Brazil were studied and of those men 118 had dong cancer…and of those…35% of them banged chickens, pigs, cows, and horses.  Goo!  Men that banged animals also had higher STDS and were more likely to participate in GROUP SEX with animals.  Gross.
  • It’s not the usual kind of statement you get from the White House but the administration wants to assure the public that there is no evidence that alien life exists beyond our planet or has tried to contact humanity.  Their comments are a response to petitions on the White House website with 17,000 signatures that the government to disclose knowledge of extraterrestrial beings and contact with them. 
  • According to a team of scientists, Bigfoot is real.  A team of more than a dozen scientists from all over the world believe that BIGFOOT exists…and he’s currently chillin in Siberia.  They say there’s a 95% chance he’s there.  The team took a two day trip and found hairs, footprints,  crudely built bead, and other markers.  But so far -they haven’t actually been able to track him down.
  • A guy pulled over to send a text message while driving in Texas.  Well – bad move…he pulled in front of a house that had just been burglarized.  So the home owner came out and chased him down in his car and crashed his car into the other vehicle.  That SUCKS! for the driver…and the other guy was arrested….FAIL!

  • The Cardinals are gonna  hold a press conference today to announce that Mike Matheny is the new manager. Matheny, 41 years old and a former Cardinal, was the candidate with the least experience but they hired him anyway. He’s spent the last few years as an instructor in the minor league system.
  •  Staying in Baseball – Washington Nationals catcher Wilson Ramos who was kidnapped at gunpoint last week – was rescued on Friday.  Venezuelan commandos swept into his kidnappers’ mountain hideout and then arrested the 4 people who kidnapped him. 
  • We will get more in depth into NFL Chat when we talk to Ravey during the beat a woman segment…but the Ram Rule is lifted as the Rams beat the Browns 13-12.  Ravey was pretty close when she said it was going to be all about the Field Goals.  The Rams scored one touch down on a pass from Bradford to Brandon Lloyd and then it was all about the kicks.  A total of 6 field goals from both kickers…two coming off the foot of Josh Brown of the Rams. Other week 10 winners were: Pittsburgh, Dallas, Jacksonville, along with the Dolphins, THE ARIZONA CARDINALS, SEATTLE, TIM TEBOW AND THE BRONCOS, the Texans, New Orleans, Tennessee, Chicago, San Francisco and the Patriots.
  • Manny Pacquiao defended his welterweight title against Juan Manuel Marquez in Las Vegas on Saturday. But he won by decision, and some people don’t think he should have.

BEAT A WOMAN – NFL WEEK 10
RAVEY (8-1) VS. SEAN MOYNIHAN

GAMES OF THE WEEK
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati         ((BOTH PICK PITT)) — PUSH
Houston at Tampa Bay         ((BOTH PICK HOUSTON)) — PUSH
Jacksonville at Indianapolis     ((RAVEY PICK JAX//SEAN PICK INDY)) – RAVEY POINT
St. Louis at Cleveland         ((RAVEY PICKS STL// SEAN PICK CLE)) – – RAVEY POINT
Buffalo at Dallas             ((RAVEY PICKS DAL// SEAN PICK BUF)) – RAVEY POINT

RAVEY WINS AGAIN! SHE SWEPT SEAN 3-0!  SHE IS NOW 9-1.
RAVEY WEEK 10 TOTAL: 9 – 5

SUNDAY NIGHT GAME
New England at NY Jets          ((BOTH PICK N.E.)) – PUSH

SEAN Total Points: 42
RAVEY Total Points:44

MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL
Minnesota at Green Bay ((BOTH PICK GB))

LOCK OF THE WEEK:
SEAN : Baltimore at Seattle        ((BOTH PICK BAL)) – NO POINT FOR SEAN
RAVEY: Arizona at Philly          ((BOTH PICK PHIL)) – NO POINT FOR RAVEY

OTHER GAMES:
NY Giants at San Francisco     (( BOTH PICK S.F)) S.F
Detroit at Chicago              (( BOTH PICK CHI)) CHI
Tennessee at Carolina          ((BOTH PICK CAR)) TENN
Washington at Miami          ((BOTH PICK MIA)) MIA
Denver at Kansas City         ((BOTH PICK K.C)) DEN
New Orleans at Atlanta         ((BOTH PICK ATL)) N.O.

CHECK OUT THE RING YOU CAN WIN FROM MORITZ REUSCH JEWELRY!

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  • Sasha Grey – a former porn star – is reading to kids across the country and is trying to make her new career a good one.  She claims that she is doing nothing wrong and that she is a daughter, a sister, and blah blah blah…who cares? She is reading to first graders – they aren’t going to know who she is.  It’s all good right?  Would you be OK with her reading to your kids?
  • Tom Cruise almost got the lead in Titanic…would have been a totally different movie right?  Here are some other casting near misses….Robert Redford almost was Michael Corleone….Jake Gylennhal almost was the new Batman.  Billy Crystal almost was going to be Buzz Lightyear.  Tom Selleck was almost Indiana Jones.  Seriously – the movies would have been soooo different.
  • Black Sabbath is reuniting and putting out a new record…like…THE O.G. Black Sabbath!
  • Justin Timberlake actually went through with his promise and went to a Marine Ball with a female officer.  Neato!
  • Last week – Jay Z announced that he was going to sell shirts that read “Occupy All Streetz,”…The shirts went on sale for $22 bucks…and NO PROCEEDS went to the Occupy Movement.  People were outraged.  The shirts were taken down from the website…and now can no longer be found. 

CRAPPY BIRTHDAYS:
–Travis Barker – 36
–Josh Duhamel – 39

–Curt Schilling – 45
–Patrick Warburton – 47
–Laura San Giacomo – 49
–CONDOLEEZZA RICE – 57
–YANNI! – 57
–Prince Charles – 63

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  • Jessica Dee – 33 – today’s birthday bitch has been filled with more cream than Twinkie the Kid in 180 fine films including:
    • Filthy Little Whore
    • Beverly Hills 9021-Whore
    • Sperm Smiles
    • Six Black Sticks One White Trick
    • Spread Em Wide
    • Hot Bod and Tailpipe
    • Pink Eye Vol 5
    • Stop My Ass Is On Fire
    • Throat Yogurt
    • All Alone and No One To Bone

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  • TUESDAY (WINNER!): A man became angry when he found out about his 20-year-old daughter’s boyfriend and then hired a hit man — the man’s own brother — to kill the young woman and her boyfriend, police say. Robert J. Deja is charged with solicitation to commit murder and criminal sexual assault for allegedly assaulting the adopted daughter, police said. Police began investigating Deja in July after they learned he allegedly had been sexually abusing the woman since she was 16. Investigators learned the woman has a 3-year-old girl fathered by Deja, police said. Police say Deja became angry when he learned his daughter had a boyfriend, asking her to move out of the family home. “The victim is now pregnant again, with either her boyfriend or Robert Deja being the father,” police said in a written statement. Deja then allegedly “contacted his brother and advised him that he wanted the boyfriend and victim killed,” police said in the statement.
  • WEDNESDAY (3rd): Today’s hooshe comes to us from Florida – where 21 year old dude was arguing with his lady when she told him she was dumping him.  So he tried to overdose on drugs and kill himself.  He grabbed a bottle of pills and tried to OD.  The pills?  Flintstones vitamins. Doctors say it won’t kill you – but it would make you sick. TOTAL HOOSHE!
  • THURSDAY (4th): A western Pennsylvania man has been cited for animal cruelty and other crimes because police say he tried to pick a fight with his grandmother’s 15-year-old dog. The suspect knocked on his grandmother’s door on Oct. 10.. When his grandmother let him in, Wooddell allegedly confronted the dog, which was lying on the floor, punched it, and fled. Wooddell had been staying at his grandmother’s home, but she told him he was not welcome there before the incident, the paper notes. Wooddell does not have a listed phone. A relative’s phone could not take incoming calls when The Associated Press tried to located Wooddell for comment Monday morning.Wooddell has been charged with cruelty to animals and disorderly conduct. He was released on $1,000 bond
  • FRIDAY (2nd):On Tuesday night, 21-year-old Erica Wilson of Rogersville, Tennessee and 32-year-old Jesse Brooks were arguing about their relationship status. Jesse had touched Erica suggestively and told her that he “wanted her.”  She told him that she “wanted a relationship and didn’t want to be a BOOTY CALL.” Ready for the TWIST?  Erica and Jesse are . . . wait for it . . . FIRST COUSINS.  Well done, Tennessee. Anyway, the fight over whether these two FIRST COUSINS would have relations during a booty call or relations as a couple got ugly. Jesse allegedly pushed over Erica . . . she grabbed a pair of scissors and STABBED HIM in the face, neck, arms, and back. When the cops came to break things up, both of them smelled of alcohol . . . and they admitted they’d been drinking “significant amounts” of Everclear GRAIN ALCOHOL.  Again, well done, Tennessee.
        • WINNER: Adopted Daughter Do It Yourselfer

RING THE BELL:

  • Two soccer players in Iran have been suspended indefinitely for a “immoral” celebration during a match.  Apparently grabbing another’s guy but for a split second is considered immoral.  It DOES look like there is some poking….RING THE BELL.
  • A new nail polish…for dudes…is geared for dudes who like to paint their nails.  Available in three colors – gray, purple, and gunmetal…it actually real.  RING THE BELL!
    • CHECK OUT THE 9AM PODCAST FOR ALL THE RING THE BELL CALLERS AND TEXTERS!

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live: http://1057thepoint.com
This entry was posted in Comedy, Epic, Funny, Radio. Bookmark the permalink.

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