ANTHEM: COOL ASS CRACK HEAD….
DON’T FORGET TO JOIN TEAM NINJA AND JOINING US AT THE SUSAN G. KOMEN WALK. YOU CAN CLICK HERE TO GET MORE INFORMATION!
- Michael Devlin , the a-hole that kidnapped Shawn Hornbeck and Ben Ownby…well he’s back in the news. He was shanked in prison by two homemade knives. The inmate that stabbed him named one of the knives Ben, and the other named Shawn. Apparently he made them out of keyboard keys. Unfortunately – his injuries were non life threatening.
- A dude in Florida was busted making an illegal U-Turn…but was taken to jail and caught with a marijuana pipe….shoved in his b-hole. You like weed….sure….but do you like it THAT MUCH?!
- In Iowa, a dispatcher was fired after he was constantly talking about sex, asking people if their areas were pierced, was fired after SHE kept doing it. She told a male officer: “Make sure your pipes don’t get rusty.” The final straw came when she made an inappropriate comment over the phone in which the call was recorded.
- After reading this…are you still going to be against the death penalty? 24 year old dude was arrested after he kidnapped, raped, and murdered a 9 year old girl that lived with him. He said he just snapped. Cops found bloody clothes in his apartment where he lived with his…FIANCE! She was just hanging outside playing.
- Chris Carpenter got his first win of the season last night as the Cards went on to beat the Cubs 6-4. The team announced yesterday that Tony LaRussa will not be traveling with the team but should be back on Monday when the team comes back to St. Louis. Cards and Cubs at it again tonight – first pitch is at 7:15.
- Last night in the NHL – the Red Wings have now come back from trailing their series 3 games to none to force a game seven against San Jose. That game will be tomorrow night – and the winner takes on Vancouver in the Western Conference Finals.
- In the NBA – the Bulls got the win over the Hawks last night to take a 3-2 lead in their series. Tonight – the Heat looks to eliminate the Celtics in game 5 and Oklahoma City and Memphis meet for game 5 with their series tied at two games a piece.
- Reggie Bush is getting some trouble from fans over something he posted on Twitter yesterday. Dude’s an idiot. He posted: “Everybody complaining about the lockout! Shoot I’m making the most of it! Vacation, rest, relaxing, appearances here and there! I’m good.” Just a few minutes later he posted: “Right about now we would be slaving in 100 degree heat, practicing twice a day, while putting our bodies at risk for nothing.” So after getting a bunch of crap from people Bush took to Twitter again – this time to defend himself saying: “FYI last tweet was a joke! Relax people damn it’s called sense of humor! Cry me a river why don’t you…” This actually isn’t the first time Bush has done something stupid with his Twitter account. During the draft when the Saints selected Mark Ingram – Bush tweeted out: “It’s been fun New Orleans.”
- Betty White is the most appealing celeb with Spencer Pratt being the least. The other type 2 were Sandra Bullock and Will Smith. The top ten can be found right here. CLICK!
- Al Pacino has now signed on to do the Gotti movie.
- Gary Coleman has NOT been buried yet. It’s almost been A YEAR!
LATE NIGHT TV:
David Letterman: Keith Olbermann, Chaz Bono, Ray LaMontagne
Jay Leno: Dick Van Dyke, Khloe Kardashian & Lamar Odom, Steve Earle
Jimmy Kimmel: Chris O’Donnell, Ginnifer Goodwin, Zac Brown Band
Craig Ferguson: Tim Meadows, Colin Hay
Jimmy Fallon: Keith Richards, Paul Bettany, Jennifer Hudson, Jakob Dylan
Carson Daly: Charles Bradley, Spencer Susser, Grouplove
Conan O’Brien: Jon Hamm, Miranda Kerr, Ke$ha
Lopez Tonight: Nick Cannon, Bruno Tonioli, Musiq Soulchild
WOODY’S PICK OF THE DAY: Martha
“Glee” star Cory Monteith
Actress Shohreh Aghdashloo
Australian singer Holly Valance
“Riding the Bullet” actor Jonathan Jackson
Rammstein drummer Christoph Schneider
Actress Frances Fisher
Peter North – 54 – this porno LEGENDARY he whore has laid more pipe than the local 562 in 1795 fine films including:
– The Adventures of Buck Naked
– Ali Boobie and the 40 D’s
-Ass Ventura: Crack Detective
– Shaved Sinners
– Earth Girls Are Sleazy
– A Hard Act To Swallow
– Immaculate Erection
– On Golden Blonde
– Rimjob Rita
– Sheepless In Montana
– 2’s Company, Three’s An Orgy
– Let Me Tell You Bout Fat Chicks
iPOD CHALLENGE: WHO’S iPOD IS THIS SONG IN?!
WHO’S iPOD?! PATRICO
BITCH BE TRIPPIN’: ((CHECK OUT THE 8AM PODCAST FOR CALLERS AND TEXTERS))
– Last week in Florida…cops got a call about a driver who smashed her ride into a pole and cops were shocked to find out why….she was hammered and started pooping in her own car before crashing…
– Last week a broad stormed into her boyfriend’s apartment and started arguing with him about money…She got so pissed…she started pouring ACID on the dude! She was arrested! BBT!
– A woman was pulled over for speeding when she was busted with a bunch of stolen stuff in her car. Why was she speeding? She was headed to court…for what? SHOPLIFTING
– A woman and her boyfriend got in a fight in their apartment and it got so bad that she grabbed her boyfriends face…and BIT HIS LIP OFF! Even worse…she then spit it out the front door onto the street outside. Someone – very gross – picked it up and put it on ice. They were able to reattach the tongue and the woman was arrested. BBT!