In TODAY’S DISCOUNT NEWS it’s all about the Creepers!  We talk about a dude JOing in a Hobby Lobby, an effin psycho who attacks a woman with a hammer, and a cop who is SOOOOOO fired!

A man in New Mexico walked into a Hobby Lobby arts and crafts and was wondering around the store.  He found a 10 and 13 year old girl and when they looked at him, he whipped out his hog and started VIGOROUSLY JO-ing.  The girls took off and cops are still looking for him.  When caught, he’s looking at all kinds of indecent exposure charges.

What an EFFIN PSYCHO! Daniel Happ, 27 of Carpentersville, Ill., was arrested early Wednesday. Inside the home, responding officers found an unconscious 23-year-old woman who had been bludgeoned with a hammer. They also found the woman’s 8-year-old daughter, who had been sexually assaulted, and a dog that had been stabbed multiple times. The woman, whose condition has not been released was taken to the Hospital for treatment. The girl has been taken to a safe place and the dog is being treated by an area veterinarian. What a nutcase!

This story is long but hilarious! A veteran city police officer has been suspended and is facing additional disciplinary measures and possibly criminal charges after a woman alleged that he showed her a picture of his genitals during a traffic stop Wednesday night. 2006 Officer of the Year Paul Mabey was suspended with pay as of 1 p.m. Friday, after a 26-year-old Norwalk woman’s allegations she suffered “embarrassment and shame” after being stopped for talking on her cell phone while driving. The woman, who was with her 21-month-old baby, said after she rebuffed a pass by Mabey, he pulled out his cell phone and showed her the picture. According to her allegation, Mabey pulled her over early Wednesday evening and looked at her lap during the stop and noticed that her dress had ridden up her thighs. After apologizing, the woman, who works for the federal government as a data analyst, rolled her dress down. She then said Mabey replied, “No. I like what I see.” The woman then told Mabey he was not her type and, with her daughter sitting in a rear baby seat, he then asked if that was because he was white, she said. She said no, that it was because he was too old. “I’m only 40. … That’s not old, it’s experienced,” she quoted Mabey saying back to her in her formal complaint, which was sent to Nivakoff. After taking her license and registration to his car, Mabey came back and told her she should plead not guilty to the cell phone ticket and buy and present a receipt for a hands-free device and the ticket will go away, she said in her letter. At that point, the woman said she was ready to forgive Mabey’s behavior until he said, “Want to see what 40-year-old experience will do for you?” She said Mabey then pulled out his cell phone and showed her the picture.

On Saturday, a 63-year-old editor from the Portland newspaper “The Oregonian” died of a heart attack.  And in his obituary, the paper revealed exactly HOW he died . . . after GETTING-IT-ON with a 23-year-old mistress who was using him to buy her stuff.  He’s survived by his wife and three daughters . . . who are probably pretty angry at his former employer right now.

A charitable marketing program that paid homeless people to carry Wi-Fi signals at South By Southwest has drawn widespread debate at the annual Austin conference and around the country. BBH Labs, a unit of the global marketing agency BBH, gave 13 people from Austin’s Front Steps Shelter mobile Wi-Fi devices and T-shirts that announced “I am a 4G Hotspot.” The company paid them $20 up front and a minimum of $50 a day for about six hours work. She called the experiment a modernized version of homeless selling street newspapers. All of the money paid for Wi-Fi — an often difficult thing to find at SXSW — went to the participants, who were selected in partnership with Front Steps. ($2 was the recommended donation for 15 minutes of use.)

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live:
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