In today’s CRAP ON CELEBS we chat about why the Secret Service would like a word with Ted Nugent AND the Parents Television Council is BACK IN THE NEWS (what NOW?!).  Plus we have your CRAPP BDAYS and WORLD FAMOUS PORNO BDAY!


Wanna see a Rihanna nip slip that she posted on FACEBOOK?  Check it out HERE.

Some Secret Service agents may have to roll off their Colombian whores long enough to investigate TED NUGENT for some controversial comments he made at an NRA convention over the weekend. Here’s a taste of what he said . . . “It isn’t the enemy that ruined America.  It’s good people who bent over and let the enemy in.  If the coyote’s in your living room pissing on your couch, it’s not the coyote’s fault.  It’s your fault for not shooting him.” Our president and attorney general, our vice president, HILLARY CLINTON . . . they’re criminals.” “If Barack Obama becomes the president in November, again, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year.”  “If you don’t know that our government is wiping its ass with the Constitution, you’re living under a rock somewhere.” “If you can’t go home and get everybody in your lives to clean house in this vile, evil, America-hating administration, I don’t even know what you’re made out of.” “Remember we’re Americans because we defied the king.  We didn’t negotiate and compromise with the king, we defied the emperors.  We are patriots.  We are Braveheart.  We need to ride into that battlefield and chop their heads off in November.  Any questions?”

AXL ROSE has made his first comments since Saturday’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony . . . and surprisingly, he does NOT take any shots at his former band mates, the Rock Hall or anyone else. Instead, Axl is thanking everyone for the “overwhelmingly positive response” to his decision to skip the induction . . . and it doesn’t even sound like he’s being sarcastic. He adds, quote, “With such a generous outpouring of solidarity from fans, media outlets, writers and other artists, I’m truly humbled, blown away and unbelievably relieved!  To be honest, I thought it would go the other way.” He also reiterates that he “didn’t want to disappoint anyone” . . . and says he still doesn’t “have enough verified information” to “understand what the [Rock] Hall is.”

FAB MORVAN . . . the surviving member of MILLI VANILLI . . . believes he’s something of a TRAILBLAZER, because a ton of artists are faking vocals these days. He says, quote, “There’s no difference between what I did back then and what people are doing now.  If you wanna break it down, people might say, ‘Well you didn’t sing’ . . . but the fact of the matter is that now the machines are doing it.” In addition to using machinery in the studio, Fab points out that nobody is singing live in concert anymore, either.  He says, quote, “I ain’t pointing the finger, but if you’re doing all this and you’re not performing the song live . . . then you’re not doing anything different from what I did.”

Not surprisingly, the Parents Television Council is NOT happy with ABC’s new show “Don’t Trust the B—- in Apt. 23” . . . but their complaints go beyond the title. They have released this review of the show:  Quote, “[It’s] a sexist mixed-bag of hedonism, drug-use, alcohol abuse (including the main character plying a 13-year-old boy with alcohol to get him drunk) and explicit levels of promiscuity that are shocking even by today’s broadcast TV standards.” They’re asking their members to contact the show’s advertisers, specifically Volkswagen and AT&T, to “hold them accountable” for their sponsorship of the show. The PTC previously complained about the title . . . saying it continues a, quote, “disturbing trend of using offensive, profane language in [show titles, which] is nearly impossible for families to avoid.”

TUPAC’S live performance at Coachella . . . in HOLOGRAM form . . . was such a success that there’s talk about taking “him” out on TOUR.  The “Wall Street Journal” reports that SNOOP DOGG and DR. DRE are thinking about a virtual tour, which could either hit clubs . . . or stadiums, if they were able to bring in other rappers, like Eminem, 50 Cent and Wiz Khalifa. Snoop and Dre commissioned a company to create the Tupac “hologram.”  It’s actually NOT a full-on hologram, because it’s still a 2-D image.  The company says Dre has a, quote, “massive vision for this.” There’s no comment from Snoop or Dr. Dre.  Also, it’s unclear if the technology is where it needs to be for this to be possible, or if that would take further development.

SIMON COWELL’S horniness almost cost him some major trade secrets.  TMZ says that last October, Simon had a one-night stand . . . and he made the mistake of taking the chick back to his house. The next morning, he woke up to find her gone . . . along with his cash-stuffed wallet AND a computer that had “X Factor” secrets on it. Luckily, Simon’s security cameras caught her, and police were able to track her down.  So he got his computer and wallet back . . . but apparently, the cash was already gone


–Rick Moranis – 59
–Kourtney Kardashian 33
–America Ferrera – 28 (She WAS “Ugly Betty”.)
–James Woods – 65
–Conan O’Brien – 49
–Melissa Joan Hart – 36 (“Sabrina the Teenage Witch”)
–Alia Shawkat – 23 (Maeby on “Arrested Development”.)
–Eric McCormack – 49 (Will on “Will & Grace”.)
–Jane Leeves – 51 (Daphne on “Frasier”. Now she’s doing “Hot In Cleveland” with Valerie Bertinelli, Wendie Malick and Betty White.)
–Miguel Cabrera – 29 (Detroit Tigers slugger who likes to drink. A LOT. He took a ground ball right to the face during spring training, but he’s back on the field now.)
–Maria Bello – 45 (Dr. Anna Del Amico on “ER”)
–Rosie Huntington-Whiteley – 25 (The chick in the third “Transformers” movie when Megan Fox’s hotness was no longer worth her insanity.)



Temptress – 35 – Today’s birthday girl has been plugged more than America’s Got Talent on the Howard Stern show… 213 fine films including:
“Psycho Biker Sluts From Hell”
“Toilet Tails Volume 2”
“Choose Your Cooze”
“I Know Who You Did Last Summer”
“Gentlemen Prefer Vagina”
“Tales From The Pink”
“Ally McFeal”
“Potty Mouth”
“Spank Master Volume 5”
“Every Kind Of Sex Your Parents Never Taught You”

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live:
This entry was posted in Crap On Celebrities, Porno Birthday. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s