TUESDAY’S CRAP ON CELEBRITIES

In today’s CRAP ON CELEBS we chat about Jennifer Hudson and the murder case of her family and Sarah Silverman talking about getting naked for an upcoming movie.  And of course we have your CRAPPY BIRTHDAYS and today’s WORLD FAMOUS PORNO BDAY!

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It was all the way back in 2008 that JENNIFER HUDSON’S ex-brother-in-law William Balfour murdered Jennifer’s mother, brother and 7-year-old nephew.  And his trial JUST got underway yesterday in Chicago. Jennifer was the first witness called by the prosecution.  She testified that no one in the family wanted Balfour to marry her sister Julia Hudson . . . and they didn’t like the way he treated her. She added that she never liked Balfour . . . even in grammar school.  And she said, quote, “Where he was, I tried not to be.  So if I saw him, I separated myself.” And Jennifer broke down on the witness stand as she talked about spending time with her now-deceased family members just a week before they were killed. Jennifer’s fiancé, Julia then took the witness stand and testified that Balfour threatened to kill her several times . . . especially after she left him. She said that a few months before the murders, he tried to get back with her, and she turned him down.  He told her, quote, “If you leave, you will be the last to die.”

SARAH SILVERMAN does FULL-FRONTAL NUDITY in a movie called “Take This Waltz” . . . which hits Video On Demand a month from now.  And Sarah went a little overboard in preparing her nether regions for their film debut. She says, quote, “The morning leading up to it, I over-groomed.  You know when you even and even and even until nothing’s left?  It was bad.  Never try to even from the top.  Let the top be the top.” Sarah’s co-star MICHELLE WILLIAMS gets naked, too . . . but she had just the right touch when it came to landscaping . . . quote, “I wish [mine] was fuller.  Michelle’s was so full and awesome.”

Alleged nude photos of “Twilight” star KIOWA GORDON appeared on the web earlier this week.  But the site that originally posted them was taken down after a legal assault by Gordon’s lawyers. There were two photos in which a guy who LOOKS like Kiowa is nude and taking pictures of himself in a mirror.  You can’t see his genitalia, but you can see the top of his pubic region. In a third photo, a guy is holding his penis in his hand.  But his face and body aren’t visible, so there’s no way to tell who it is. CHECK OUT THE DONG PICTURES HERE.

Remember the “Carlton Dance” from “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air”?  Well, yesterday thousands of people across the country tried to break a world record for most-people in North America flash-mobbing at the same time . . . and that was the dance they did. Carlton . . . a.k.a., Alfonso Ribeiro . . . led the main one in L.A., at an outdoor mall.  Alfonso started dancing by himself, then hundreds of people ran in and joined him. CHECK THE VIDEO HERE.

 

Between Two Ferns is coming to Comedy Central.  You probably have seen the skit with Zack Galifinakis on FunnyorDie.com.  It looks like Richard Branson, Tina Fey, and a couple others will be featured.  It looks like it may just be a one time thing.  Pretty sweet.

 

ALICIA DOUVALL . . . a model who had a six-month relationship with Simon more than 10 years ago . . . says they once got down on it ELEVEN TIMES IN ONE NIGHT. She says, quote, “On the third or fourth date we ended up doing it 11 times in one night.  We started having sex and went on through the night.  We slept a little bit in between, but only for a few minutes.” This bitch has some huge cans…but thats!
  

 

We’re all rooting for “Anchorman 2” to be awesome . . . and this might help: There will be another NEWS TEAM THROWDOWN . . . like the big brawl in the original.  Director and co-writer ADAM MCKAY says, quote, “We already have a couple ideas for it.”There’s no word if any of the news teams from the original will be back . . . like the rival squad led by VINCE VAUGHN. . . or BEN STILLER and the Spanish-Language news team.And let’s not forget the public broadcasters led by TIM ROBBINS . . . or LUKE WILSON and the Channel 2 news team.There’s a chance they WON’T all return, because the sequel takes place during the rise of cable and the 24-hour news cycle.Plus, if Luke Wilson returns, he’ll be ARMLESS, thanks to Tim Robbins and an angry grizzly bear. No matter who participates, though, McKay and WILL FERRELL have a daunting task ahead of them:  Finding something even cooler than a trident for STEVE CARELL to kill a guy with.

CRAPPY BDAYS:
–Kelly Clarkson – 30
–Cedric The Entertainer – 48
–Barbra Streisand – 70
–Djimon Hounsou – 48  (“Gladiator”, “Constantine” and
“Blood Diamond”)
–Melinda Clarke – 43  (Lady Heather on “CSI”…she was also on The OC)
–Shirley MacLaine – 78

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Aaralyn Barra – 27- Today’s birthday girl has swallowed more swimmers than JAWS…..in 132 fine films including:
“Blame It On Daddy Volume 3”
“Tinkle Time Volume 1”
“Extreme A-Hole Makeover”
“Mr. Camel Toe Volume 4”
“I Can’t Believe I Took The Whole Thing Volume 7”
“Lick Me Stick Me Volume 2”
The classics: “Destination Dirtpipe” and “Destination Tonsils”
“Don’t Pull Out Volume 2

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live: http://1057thepoint.com
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