MONDAY’S CRAP ON CELEBRITIES

In today’s CRAP ON CELEBRITIES we chat the Avengers STILL making box office records.  The networks are announcing their news shows and returning shows for this season. Also, we have today’s CRAPPY BIRTHDAYS and WORLD FAMOUS PORNO BIRTHDAY!

Photobucket

“The Avengers” continues to break records left and right.  It just made another $103 MILLION at the box office over the weekend, making it the first movie EVER to make more than $100 million in its second weekend. “The Avengers” has made $373 million in North America alone since last weekend.  But it opened internationally a week and a half before that, and has made an incredible $629 MILLION overseas. That means when the final numbers are released later today, “The Avengers” should officially break the $1 BILLION mark . . . after just 19 days in theaters. Meanwhile, JOHNNY DEPP’S “Dark Shadows” opened in the #2 spot this weekend with $28.8 million. “Think Like a Man” was third, “The Hunger Games” finished 4th, and “The Lucky One” rounds out the top 5 movies at the box office this weekend.

All the major networks are unveiling their schedules for next season this week, and NBC is up first. The biggest news is that they’re doing TWO seasons of “The Voice” next year . . . one in the fall and one in the spring. For the third year in a row, they’re launching a TON of new shows. The shows NBC is NOT bringing back next season include: “Are You There, Chelsea?”, “Awake”, “Bent”, “Best Friends Forever”, “Harry’s Law” and “The Firm”. The shows they ARE bringing back include: “The Biggest Loser”, “30 Rock”, “Community”, “Grimm”, “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit”, “Parenthood”, “Parks and Recreation”, “Smash”, “Up All Night”, “The Voice”, “Whitney”, “The Office” and “Celebrity Apprentice”.

 

Earlier this month, we heard ASHTON KUTCHER, JON CRYER and ANGUS T. JONES had signed on for another season . . . but CBS didn’t officially renew the show until now….Two and a Half Men WILL be back. This isn’t a surprise. The show averaged around 15 million viewers this season. A show that isn’t coming back…..CBS has canceled “CSI: Miami” . . . the most ridiculous of the “CSI” shows. The original “CSI” and “CSI: New York” have been renewed. Of course, the BEST PART of “CSI: Miami” was DAVID CARUSO’S hilarious portrayal of Lieutenant Horatio Caine, which spawned all kinds of jokes, parodies and drinking games.

 

“[Bleep] My Dad Says” only lasted one season on CBS . . . and now ABC has canceled its new show “GCB” after one season. “GCB” was initially announced as “Good Christian [B-words]”. ABC did renew ANOTHER show with a curse word in the title:  “Don’t Trust the B—- in Apartment 23”. Meanwhile, ABC has also renewed “Private Practice”, “Body of Proof” and TIM ALLEN’S “Last Man Standing” . . . and they’ve dumped “Pan Am”, “Missing” and “The River”.

 

NBC: Howard Stern’s debut on AMERICA’S GOT TALENT and the season finale of SMASH
CBS: The season finales of TWO AND A HALF MEN, HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, MIKE AND MOLLY, and HAWAII FIVE-O
FOX: HOUSE and the season finale of BONES
ABC: DANCING WITH THE STARS and the season PREMIERE of THE BACHELORETTE
BRAVO: INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO…..tonight, the cast and creator of “Mad Men”.

CRAPPY BIRTHDAYS:
–George Lucas – 68
–Mark Zuckerberg – 28  (His net worth is approximately $17.5 BILLION.)
–Suzy Kolber – 48  (Sideline reporter)
–Miranda Cosgrove – 19
–Cecil “C.C.” DeVille – 50  (Poison guitarist)
–Amber Tamblyn – 29
–Fabrice Morvan – 46  (The living Milli Vanilli!)
–Cate Blanchett – 43
–Danny Wood – 43  (New Kids on the Block)
–Ian Astbury – 50  (The Cult)
–Tim Roth – 51  (“Reservoir Dogs”, “Pulp Fiction”, “Planet of the Apes” and “The Incredible Hulk”)
–Sofia Coppola – 41
–Tony Siragusa – 45  (Former NFL player….now a sideline reporter for Fox)
–David Byrne – 60  (Talking Heads singer)

Photobucket
Jenny Baby – 25 -Today’s birthday girl has been hammered more than a college frat boy in 92 fine films including:
“Jeny’s A Pervert”
“Tied and Sodomized”
“Drunk Sex Orgy: Booty Pageant”
“Cream Crime Volume 1”
“Fist Club Volume 2″
“Fist Feast”
“3-Way Split”
“Anal Gate Volume 1: A-hole Combustion”

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live: http://1057thepoint.com
This entry was posted in Crap On Celebrities, Porno Birthday. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s