TUESDAYS CRAP ON CELEBS & TODAY’S PORNO BDAY

Today’s CRAP ON CELEBS has us chatting about a Rob Zombie & Marilyn Manson tour, Sarah Silverman willing to scissor for Obama. And some Charlie Sheen news!  Plus today’s CRAPPY BDAYS and today’s PORNO BDAY!

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SARAH SILVERMAN wants PRESIDENT OBAMA to win re-election so badly that she’s willing to RUB CROTCHES with a 78-year-old man. SHELDON ADELSON is a 78-year-old billionaire who has pledged to donate up to $100 million to MITT ROMNEY’S campaign, if need be. But Sarah has posted a video urging Adelson to donate that money to Obama instead.  And in return, she will SCISSOR HIM. I know what you’re thinking:  A man and a woman can’t scissor . . . that’s a lesbian thing.  Well, Sarah’s got that worked out. She’ll wear a BIKINI BOTTOM, and they’ll simulate lesbian sex.  There won’t be any intercourse or anything, but Sarah promises to keep on scissoring until Sheldon FINISHES. She says, quote, “Do you know how many Republican billionaires are giving money to Romney?  All of them. “How many of them are getting scissored by a bikini-bottomed Jewess with big naturals?  How many, Sheldon?” You can check out the video below:

ALSO CHECK OUT NAKED PICTURES OF SARAH SILVERMAN FROM “THE LAST WALTZ!

SYLVESTER STALLONE’S son SAGE died on Friday at age 36.  And since then, rumors have been flying around about how he died. His dad wants them to stop.  Yesterday, Sylvester said, quote, “When a parent loses a child there is no greater pain.  Therefore I am imploring people to respect my talented son’s memory.” He also asked for the, quote, “speculation and questionable reporting” to stop. And in response to his request . . . it seems that the speculation and questionable reporting has JUST RAMPED UP EVEN MORE. The kings of speculation and questionable reporting, Radar Online, are reporting that a source told them LAPD detectives are planning to track down Sage’s doctors to question them. Apparently there were several prescription bottles found in Sage’s bedroom and they came from several different doctors . . . an anonymous source says the cops, quote, “want to establish a timeline . . . and know what his medical history was.” Sage’s autopsy was completed yesterday but the results won’t be released until a toxicology report is done . . . that will take four to six weeks.

Former CHARLIE SHEEN goddess and porn star BREE OLSON is now a singer…..and she’s recorded her first single.  It’s called “Hollywood Douchebag”. WARNING: it’s really bad……we’ve got a clip AND the video is BELOW. The song is about A-hole Hollywood guys, and it includes the line, quote, “He’s posting Twitter Tweets during sex with me.”  And Bree admits that line was inspired by Charlie. She says, quote, “Charlie discovered Twitter when we started dating, so we had some funny experiences.  I thought of him when I wrote that lyric.  Yes, he would tweet in bed.” As bad as the song/video is…..there are a ton of nasty, slutty looking half dressed whores in the video for you to look at. Just keep it on mute.

CHARLIE announced that he’s donating one-percent of the profits from his FX show “Anger Management” to the USO. He’s guaranteeing the donation will be at least $1 MILLION, but there’s no limit on how high it can go. Charlie will hand over the first installment of $250,000 in a private ceremony later this week. He says, quote, “They put their lives on the line for us every day, and I’m just happy that my work on ‘Anger Management’ can bring a little bit of relief to the troops and their families.”

Every year, the INSANE CLOWN POSSE hosts a music, comedy, and wrestling festival called the Gathering of the Juggalos at a camp site in Illinois.  By all reports, for those few days, it’s actually the craziest place in the entire world. ICP just released a 23-minute video promoting the Gathering and it’s even MORE insane than you’d guess.  It’s got bad green screen effects, bad special effects . . . and promotes a SHOCKINGLY STRONG lineup. This year’s Gathering will feature The Game, George Clinton, Warren G, Three 6 Mafia, Onyx, the Geto Boys, DMX, Jamie Kennedy, Bobcat Goldthwait, Cheech and Chong, Master P, Raekwon, and The Pharcyde. Of course, Insane Clown Posse headlines over all of them. You can see the video on today’s below:

The fifth season premiere of Breaking Bad was the most-watched episode in the history of the series. 2.9 million people tuned in on Sunday night — marking a 34% increase in the all-important 18-49 demo over last year’s premiere. 3.5 million people then viewed the night’s repeat episode. Meanwhile……The official numbers are in and Good Morning America squarely beat Today during Savannah Guthrie’s debut week on NBC. Nielsen confirmed that GMA beat its rival by 357,000 viewers.

TUESDAY TV:
NBC:
AMERICA’S GOT TALENT
FOX: HELLS KITCHEN and MASTERCHEF
ABC: WIPEOUT and the new improv show TRUST US WITH YOUR LIFE – Tonight, the improv actors re-enact moments from Ricky Gervais’ life.

CRAPPY BDAYS:
–David Hasselhoff – 60
–Carey Hart – 37  (Professional motocrosser who’s married to Pink)
–Mark Burnett – 52  (He’s the producer behind reality shows like “Survivor”, and “The Apprentice”)
–Alex Winter- 47  (Bill S. Preston, Esquire in “Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure”)
–Geezer Butler – 63  (Bassist for Black Sabbath)
–Camilla Parker-Bowles – 65  (Prince Charles nails her real good)



Brandy Alexandre – 48  – Today’s birthday girl has been mounted more times than a race horse……in 81 fine films including:
“Kinky Business Volume 2”
“Whore of the Roses”
“Caught From Behind Volume 9”
“Sexual Olympics Volume 2”
“No Holes Barred”
“Camp Beaverlake”
“Who Shaved Aja?”
“When Larry Ate Sally”

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live: http://1057thepoint.com
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