THURSDAY’S CRAP ON CELEBS & TODAY’S PORNO BDAY

Today’s CRAP ON CELEBS has us chatting about the Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson nightmare that has her being called a SLUT WHORE.  We talk the Biebs and paparazzi, and of course your CRAPPY BDAYS and PORNO BDAYS!

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Sometimes the tabloids get it right. It turns out that Kristen Stewart IS a whore….and that she DID cheat on Robert Pattinson with her “Snow White” director RUPERT SANDERS. It happened on July 17th in a few discreet areas around L.A.  And not surprisingly, there was a photographer on their trail. (There are some pics on today’s show blog. The photographer followed Kristen from her house to the parking lot of an empty building.  Shortly after she pulled in, Rupert arrived and got into Kristen’s car . . . and they proceeded to GET IT ON. The photographer says, quote, “Kristen was sitting up with her back against the driver’s-side window, and this guy was KISSING HER ENTIRE BODY.”  But once they got the feeling they were being watched, they left in Kristen’s car. After that they went to the Pacific View Trail, which is near the Hollywood sign.  They parked and started making out again. Then they got out of the car and started groping and making out AGAIN.  The photographer says, quote, “He was all over her.  It seemed like they couldn’t get enough.” But every time they heard a voice or saw someone coming, they would, quote, “split up and walk in opposite directions.” Then they got back IN the car and made out for another 20 minutes . . . before she dropped Rupert off three blocks from his house.  They kissed one more time, and he walked home. KRISTEN STEWART apologized yesterday, she said, quote, “I’m deeply sorry for the hurt and embarrassment I’ve caused to those close to me and everyone this has affected. “This momentary indiscretion has jeopardized the most important thing in my life, the person I love and respect the most, Rob.  I love him, I love him, I’m so sorry.” Kristen definitely wants to stay with Rob and make things right with him. Kristen did NOT apologize to Rupert’s wife, or their two children. But Rupert did…..he issued his own apology, saying, quote, “I am utterly distraught about the pain I have caused my family. My beautiful wife and heavenly children are all I have in this world.  I love them with all my heart.  I am praying that we can get through this together.” What a bunch of a-holes.  See some pictures tomorrow…

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CHECK OUT THE CRYING TWILIGHT FAN BEING OVER THE TOP OBNOXIOUS!

You had to know this was coming . . . KRISTEN STEWART is getting DEATH THREATS on Twitter for breaking ROBERT PATTINSON’S heart.  Here are a few examples . . . 1) “Kristen Stewart cheated on Robert Pattinson with her director . . . WTF?!  *loads and cocks gun*  Imma kill that bitch.” 2) “Dear Kristen Stewart,  Thank you for cheating on Rob.  Now he’s mine.  But I’m still going to kill you for breaking his heart.” and 3) “So Kristen Stewart finally cheated on Robert Pattinson.  Bitch is about to die.  No one cheats on Robert Pattinson.”

The coroner’s office in El Paso, Texas says Sherman Hemsley died of natural causes, and no autopsy was needed. Meanwhile, the website Gawker.com says there have been, quote, “longstanding rumors” that Sherman was GAY.  They don’t seem to be based on any real evidence though. But a lot of people are jumping on the fact that Sherman was never married and had no kids.

Warner Brothers already pulled the trailer for the movie “Gangster Squad” because it includes a scene in which thugs shoot up the audience in a movie theater. Now they’re pushing the release date from September 7th to January 11th. Obviously, that’ll put some distance between the film and the massacre that occurred last week at the midnight premiere of “The Dark Knight Rises” in Colorado. It’ll also allow them to re-shoot that scene, if they choose to.  And it sounds like they’re going to.

Here is the trailer:

JON STEWART and STEPHEN COLBERT aren’t leaving Comedy Central anytime soon.  Both of them have just agreed to contract extensions. Jon will continue doing “The Daily Show” through mid-2015 . . . and Stephen’s “Colbert Report” has been renewed through 2014. The shows scored four Emmy nominations apiece last week.

AEROSMITH performed in East Rutherford, New Jersey on Tuesday night . . . and DARRYL “D.M.C.” MCDANIELS from RUN-D.M.C. joined them onstage for “Walk This Way”. There are some amateur videos of this on today’s show blog….but in reading about it, they mentioned how Aerosmith and Run-D.M.C.’s version of “Walk This Way” was released 26 years ago! That’s crazy! It’s been 37 YEARS since Aerosmith put out the original.

Earlier this month, JUSTIN BIEBER was stopped for driving between 80 and 100 miles per hour on a Southern California freeway to avoid the paparazzi.  Well, one of the scumbags who was chasing him is now facing criminal charges. He was hit with FOUR criminal charges under a new paparazzi law that makes it illegal to create a dangerous situation while following a celebrity for profit.  He’s the first “victim” of the law. If convicted on all counts, he could face up to a year in jail and $3,500 in fines.

Lamb Of God singer Randy Blythe is still sitting in a Czech jail, almost a month after his arrest, thanks to the prosecutor in his case challenging his posting of bail for a second time. Blythe is accused of causing a head injury to a fan who was thrown off the stage at a 2010 Lamb Of God show and died two weeks later. The prosecutor is reportedly seeking to keep Blythe in prison until a possible trial begins so that he does not flee the country. A judge is set to rule on the prosecutor’s actions on Friday and if he rules in Blythe’s favor, the singer could be released within 10 days.

Russell Brand is facing charges for throwing a paparazzo’s iPhone through a window in New Orleans earlier this year. TMZ.com reported that the New Orleans District Attorney’s Office charged the comedian with one count of misdemeanor criminal damage on Wednesday (July 25th). If convicted, the Get Him to the Greek star could serve up to six months in jail pay or a $500 fine.

THURSDAY TV:
CBS: BIG BROTHER and the premiere of a show called “3”
FX: ANGER MANAGEMENT, LOUIE and WILFRED
MTV: SNOOKI & JOWOWW
FOX: The season finale of TAKE ME OUT
ABC: WIPEOUT

CRAPPY BDAYS:
–Mick Jagger – 69
–Kate Beckinsale – 39
–Jeremy Piven – 47  (Super agent Ari Gold on “Entourage”)
–Taylor Momsen – 19  (“Gossip Girl”….. She got her start as Cindy Lou Who in “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”)
–Kevin Spacey – 53
–Sandra Bullock – 48
–Joe Jackson – 84  (Michael Jackson’s abusive father)
–Helen Mirren – 67
–Gary Cherone – 51
–Dorothy Hamill – 56  (Gold Medal Figure skater from the 76 Olympics)
–Roger Taylor – 63  (Queen’s drummer)
–James Best – 86  (Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane on “The Dukes Of Hazzard”.  Catherine Bach, who played Daisy Duke, says that James Best is quite gifted in length AND girth)


Delilah Stone – 30 – Today’s birthday girl has been torn apart like like elk in the lion’s den……in 64 fine films including:
“Take That Deep Throat This Volume 2”
“All Holes No Poles Volume 4”
“Big Butt Brotha Lovers Volume 12”
“So Many White Women So Little Time Volume 1”
“Hot Bods And Tail Pipe Volume 28”
“Ripe ‘n Ready Volume 2”
“1000 Facials Volume 4”
“Deep In Cream 2: Fire In The Hole”

About war1057

Woody and Rizzuto: Insensitivity Training For A Politically Correct World. Class is in session Mon-Fri 6am-10am (central). Stream live: http://1057thepoint.com
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2 Responses to THURSDAY’S CRAP ON CELEBS & TODAY’S PORNO BDAY

  1. Javier says:

    I knew ogress were real this crying bitch proves it.

  2. high says:

    Like like

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